Friday, April 30, 2010

COME ON, WE GOTTA HAVE MESS!

In the words reminiscent of Forrest Gump: Mess is what mess do. Some people love mess. They call it innocent gossip.


Yes sir buddy, mess can be some stakin’ mess! But what the hell is mess? Does it stank like sh*t. Is it like having an affair? I think we all can agree – that’s some sticky mess.

I think mess comes in all flavors? But, let me see if I can break this down so we all can smell it.

I have a friend – I’m not going to mention her name – that wrote a beautiful article on race relations. That blog post received wave reviews and awards. Click it:


It was creme de cacao writing (sweat with a chocolate flavor) that centered on her relationships with other black women. Do check it out. It’s a masterpiece.

But see, my friend also likes to bring me mess, so I am compelled to splash a little on her.
In that blog post she spoke of having to play the race card, and/or not wanting to play the race game. I am not going to give the post away but she recently asked me:


"Carey, what is it with you and comparing folks? It's like you're always trying
to start some mess. :)"

See, I ve recently compared Oprah to Harriet Tubman, and Jamie Fox to Mo`nique. It appears that I was intentionally trying to start some mess. Well, I have to admit that I do get a special kind of boner when I encourage interesting folks to participate in friendly discourse.

But listen, my sister of the struggle went on to drop this interesting bit of personal information:

"Believe it or not, I have never seen "Ray." I am debating about "Precious" but
will probably see it because I have read so much about it. (Never read the book
either but, also, will likely get to it eventually.)"
Now see, that hit me right in my old fat-black-tummy.

After a few more exchanges I hit her with the following: "Btw, your black card is on suspension. What do you mean you've never see "Ray"? But wait, have you seen Shaft or the Five Heartbeats? I mean, tomorrow you'll be telling me that you've never cooked greens or been called a nig*a. LMBAO! In order to get your card back, I need a note from your parents. Yes, give Dr. Huxtable a call. We have to get to the bottom of this. But if you can tell me that you know how to Double-Dutch, all will be forgiven"


I mean really, who has not seen Shaft or Ray? Who amongst us has not
seen The Color Purple or played spades. What collard green eating negro doesn’t know that "Life" is a movie starring Eddie Murphy & Martin lawrence. If I say "why you talk so nasty Ray" most black people will respond with "because I’m a nasty muthatfuker".

I don’t know, maybe it’s me. Just because I was born and raised in the
Brier Patch, doesn’t mean that everybody loves chitterlings. Heck, there’s probably some people that do not know that Leon Spinks and Cornel West are both black men. Who am I to pull somebodies race card?

But you know what, there should be some kind of test. You know, a "black like me" test. Hell, if I have to prove my American- ness, by knowing all the dead presidents, and their party affiliation, a colored fella should have to know the ways of the black party. Isn’t that fair?

But, when I think about it, I could be starting a little mess. Oops. Damit, there I go again.


But seriously, who doesn’t know Buckwheat, or has never watched an episode of The Good Times? "Ain’t we lucky we got them..... GOOD TIMES!"
I wonder how many people have never seen "Ray", Shaft or the Five Heartbeats. Hell, I bet Kit, http://keepittrill.blogspot.com/ has even watched at least one of them *lol*. And she was raised on a mountain top in Tennessee.

I can’t look-up my friends dress to see the real color of her hair, so I’m going to have to pull her race card. Would that be starting mess? I mean, come on, who hasn’t seen Roots or the rest of our favorite movies?

Maybe I should ask a few courageous souls to raise their hands. Who would say they have never seen any of the movies I mentioned? Nawl, nobody would be that brave? Or would they?

uglyblackjohn said...
I read all three parts of her post.What I tend to notice is that most people on my blogroll are (or have been) The Only One(s) for most of their lives.In reality, there is no absolute definition of what it is to be "Black".What we generaly accept is what enables us to get along with most others Blacks.The nonsense starts when we assume that we must have knowledge of the hood to be legit.But this thinking often holds many back.Why should someone who grew up in a "Huxtible" environment have to go back and learn hood values instead of learning the culture of those who own things?IMO - It is the thinking that Black=Poor, Fat, Ugly, Uneducated, Criminal, et.al.But this is not the case. We need to define our own Blackness (Without accecpting that all the bad stereotypes are required for Blackness.)

FreeMan said...
Well there is a agreed upon norm that most of us have. When I ran into my boy from Alabama he was shocked that I called June Bugs June Bugs and he knew then that I was alright. Although I grew up Muslim I still know the greater Black norms. I think a lot of people are ashamed of some of these things and turn up their nose to them like their liking Fried Chicken is a sin. While alot of these things are associated with poverty it has to be taken from the fact that we are 3 generations up from real segregation and that's why we call people Big Mama or Nana. We don't hate Tyler Perry we just want to keep our ignorant cousins off of the movie screen.I think I passed the Black test for my boy in Alabama and still get quizzed on it when I run into my elders who ask me do I know the Black National Anthem. Our Race and our group is ever evolving unlike others and as such we accept new slang and input as we negotiate being in this bigoted country. Some want a definition about who we are as a Race and people like me accept the new with the old as we take this journey of being more than the past and at the same time anticipating the future.


PPR_Scribe said...
Well, I *have* seen "Shaft"--multiple times, in fact. Though I prefer "Superfly" since it comes with one of my all time favorite soundtracks. LOLYou know, I can't stand all that racial authenticity crap, but I know it is tremendously important to many people. A while back (mid 70s?) there was an "alternative" IQ test designed by a Black psychologist. It was called the B.I.T.C.H. (Black Intelligence Test of Cultural...something). I recall using it for a seminar I was leading and finding it so incredibly time- and regionally-bound.I guess it is like your paraphrase of Gump: Black is as Black does...


CareyCarey said...
oooh, that's good Freeman, you're hitting on all cylinders.I didn't even consider the fact that you and Uncle Black would go deep. I submitted that post as a humorous sort of thing but I forgot that some would read PPR_Scribes's post. She's as Black as my momma's old black skillet - okay. I don't mean in skin color but as being part of a culture. That's the interesting part of her post. The race card game has many dealers.Freeman, I think you hit on a very poignat point.I believe some blacks that are offended by being associated with things that are considered "black" are those that don't really want to be considered "black". Some see it as a curse. That's mess.Heck, as a culture, we have our own meanings for the word "mess". That was the root of my post. At least I intended it to be. Do I start mess? YES I DO! *LOL*


CareyCarey said...
"I guess it is like your paraphrase of Gump: Black is as Black does..."Hello PPR_Scribe, I see you creeped up behind me. That was a great catch. I was wondering if people would see the irony and humor in this post. Of course you knew I was jackin' with you but I kinda thought a rescue crew would show up. Of course the "racial authenticity" game is pure mess, so what's at the root/core of that game? Why do people challenge blacks to prove their blackness?

PPR_Scribe said...
Found it! Black Intelligience Test of Cultural Homogeneity (BITCH). Here it is: http://tinyurl.com/yb2r4vg

Keith said...
Okay...I've seen everything you named except "The Five Heartbeats"I can't beleive I've never seen it.My friends don't beleive it. See,I'm a singer and that is supposed to be a singer's movie..That's just one I missed. I've been meaning to rent it on DVD, but have just never got around to it.Carey,can I still keep my "Black" cards?? lolol.


CareyCarey said...
Yeah Keith, you can keep your card :-)But man, you gotta see the Five Heartbeats. And you're a singer too! Check this, they are singing songs from the good ol'days. It's a great family movie. Trust me, you'll be singing along. Let me know when you pick it up, really.I like my movies deep. I like dialog. Drama, mystery and suspense are my favorites. Yet, I also do feel good movies. This one hits the spot. But see, you get a permanant "blackness" card if you've seen Hustle & Flow. *lol*I resisted watching that one because of the title. I gave in when I heard all the talk about Terrence Howard doing an Oscar performance. I'll now say it was worth my time.


uglyblackjohn said...
I thought I had seen all the requisite Black movies until Invisible Woman gave me a whole new (deeper) list.


CareyCarey said...
Come on Uncle Black. I need to see that list? I have driven over a thousand miles to film festivals. I have a burning desire to see your list. Take me deep, I like deep. But deep for deep sake will not get it. If they are quality movies, I might have seen them. Lets go, try me.


uglyblackjohn said...
Check out her spot;http://invisible.cinema.blogspot.com/I thought I was doing alright with the movies until she broke me down.


A Free Spirit Butterfly said...
I got a little lost along the way, but I'm used to reading crime stats (lol)Love ya.I like when you start mess. Who else is gonna do it?Happy Saturday and thanks for your kind words on my blog!PS - if you got a old fat black tummy, you're hiding it well in your photo - smile

RiPPa said...
Well, I found out this year that I'm actually a white man frontin' on the internet this year. I guess that would explain why I haven't seen "Coffy", "The Wiz", or "Truck Turner" - I have seen pretty much all Blaxploitation films... I think. Does "Soul Man" count?Blackness is nothing universal. We may share the same skin tone but geographical boundaries create a certain variance in our cultural expression.Now you got me thinking Carey...The next Asian looking person I see, I'm gonna ask them if they ever seen "Enter The Dragon" or if they ever ate rice cakes. If they say no, then I'm gonna pull their card. They'll be officially white like me.

RiPPa said...
Ironically Carey, some of the people you referenced as needing to have their card pulled are actually "cultured" or refined by definition of the word.I think for the most part these are people who through education and the fulfillment of national aspirations or ideals see culture thrugh those lenses.


CareyCarey said...
RiPPa: "Well, I found out this year that I'm actually a white man frontin' on the internet this year"Now RiPPa, don't have me cut you up in here *lol*But RiPPa, this was good! RiPPa wrote: "Ironically Carey, some of the people you referenced as needing to have their card pulled are actually "cultured" or refined by definition of the word.I think for the most part these are people who through education and the fulfillment of national aspirations or ideals see culture thrugh those lenses"Now I know what I read, but I think some may have missed your point. It's not like you to throw a softball. Throw a fast hardball up in here and see if we can catch it.

Maxine said...
Is black a colour, or a people. The biggest coconut of us all still has to content with being TREATED black, which we all know in many cases means being treated like a third class citizen...this is all too brain-hurting Carey...but as always you manage to approach this with good humour ;)


CareyCarey said...
Hi Maxine, I agree, it was hurting my head, and that's why I had to give it away :-).But in your small reply, you said a lot. "Is black a colour, or a people" And then you killed it with this: ..."The biggest coconut of us all still has to content with being TREATED black" BAM!Now that there was the icing on the cake. To some degree, I believe that's what some negros are running from when they voluntarily give up their black card. But in the end, there's nowhere to run and nowhere to hide. It's a tough nipple but even the whitest spade has to suck it.


Kit (Keep It Trill) said...
Carey, my apologies, I'm on CP time finishing this post. I started reading it two days ago, but then followed your link to PPR Scribe, the lady you mentioned. Those were some long ass articles in three parts, but they were indeed, good. Then I checked out the lady who gave her the award; that's a very unusual blog.So tonight I remembered I never finished reading about your mess (lol) or commented here. Thanks for the shout out, BTW.Yeah, I'm a card carrying African American. Even used to watch the tv show of Amos n' Andy with my parents when I was little. That was some funny stuff, and the thing is, those two had class and so did their tv wives. They just didn't speak the King's English, and the NAACP got all in a snit and wanted it censored. I think they were watching the show from the distorted eyes of racism which they had internalized, because there wasn't a damn thing wrong with the program, and I knew lots of people - my parent's friends - just like them. You can now find reruns on YouTube if you want a laugh and see how many black folks homes were nicely furnished back then and the fashions.You mentioned other shows too, like Shaft and Good Times. I got bad news for you, Carey. We're old dinosaurs and a bunch of youth under 25 and even 30 have little idea of those shows.Remember Diane or Dianna, the first single (divorced) black mother with a son named Corey on tv? In hindsight I wonder if that show subtly encouraged black women to go it alone, rather that it being a reflection of black female heads of households, because statistically, there weren't that doggone many in the late '60s compared to now. There was That Girl on at the same time, with Marlow Thomas. She was the first woman on tv who was single and with her own apartment, rather than her family, because until then, unmarried women did not live on their own. Both of these shows were born of the Women's and Civil Rights movements, which I wrote more about in my post, Genocide-Light. Combined with the black exploitation movies that glorified the black man with a gun, life is now very different than when you and I were coming along. More violent, fewer marriages, more kids with absent fathers, and way more black men incarcerated. Yeah baby, I not only got my black card, but remember all the good and bad that created it. When our generation passes, much of those memories will go poof, and this next one will have their own. I'm glad they have silly movies, shows and songs to laugh about too, despite the politically correct hating on them.

CareyCarey said...
Hello Kit, I am so glad you stopped by. I was at the end of writing a long post. I was in my 4th hour. I LOST IT! I was so involved in the post that I forgot to save it along the way. Needless to say, I was thoroughly pissed!During my frustration, I checked my blog and there you were, bringing good tidings.Hey, did you know that George Stevens "Kingfish", was/is my real life uncle?I wrote a post (recently)that was very similar to your sentiments on "looking through the eyes of the blue eyes".Looking back at that post, I believe you rapped it up with this... Kit: "I think they were watching the show from the distorted eyes of racism which they had internalized"Damn, if I had your voice, I'd be a bad mofo. Then again, I'd have to deal with all your haters :-).So maybe I'll just stick with being CareyCarey. But anyway, do check out that post. There's a picture of Kingfish that's attached to it. I believe the title is, "they were more than coons"re: unusual post? Unusual has many meanings. I don't remember who gave her the award. I do remember it being a quality blog.Now speak for yourself, I am only 29 and holding. If you want to be a dinosaur, go right ahead *lol*.I never thought about your take on the early show "Diana". I guess you being a woman, you'd be more prone to seek or see thoses types of things. Then again, it could simply be because you are a big thinker. Yep, you get to keep your blackness card. You claimed it and it's yours!

Kit (Keep It Trill) said...
Nah, I was kid when Diane, one of the first black shows of the late 60s or early '70s came on. Back then we watched ANYONE who was black on tv because we were starved to see ourselves.Didn't know Kingfish was your fam. I get really pissed when I read people calling those actors coons. WTF do they know about that time period, and other than those high yellow NAACP idiots back then wanted them removed because they didn't act white enough. They still effing with the black underclass in music tastes and grass roots language in comedy, like they have a monopoly on black American culture. And stop lying about your age! You a granddaddy. Own it. :)

CareyCarey said...
Yeah Kit,re: NAACP. I totally agree with you.I didn't realize my post on Amos and Andy was way in october. If you haven't read it, here's the link:http://careycarey-carrymehome.blogspot.com/2009/10/holy-mackerel-they-were-much-more-than.html


Kit (Keep It Trill) said...
Oh, you asked about "unusual". Yes, the blog that gave PPR Scribe the award is cool and quality, but I was referring to the other blog that visually designed the award. It's very artistic, has a lot of peace promotion stuff for bloggers, etc. Check it out:http://mimiwrites.blogspot.com/


CareyCarey said...
Okay Kit,Maybe we should get a room but are we talking about the same award? Were is PPR_Scribe when I need her?Check out this link and let me know. http://www.blogher.com/blogher-week-ppr-so-called-post-post-racial-life I mean, I didn't see any mention of who actually designed the "award". I did however visit that site and I see what you mean. Wow, our exchanges seem to fit the title to this post *lol*Btw, forget the hotel thang, I wouldn't want your friends thinking you were robbing the cradle. See, I had my first child at 14. She had hers at 15. So Iam 29. Or something like that :-)But somethings not right. I can remember watching a full length movie of the 3 Stooges - in the theater

*This post was first published in 2009

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