Tuesday, June 1, 2010

MICHAEL JACKSON'S TRACKS OF MY TEARS.


It was so sad to see the needle marks on Michael Jackson. Was Michael Jackson a junkie? You know the saying: Once a junkie always a junkie. Is it possible Michael Jackson was a hype?



You know what, the body doesn't know if the drug was purchased from Scarface, Wal Mart or Walgreens. Should Michael Jackson be viewed any differently than the crackhead that buys 10 dollar vials of crack cocaine off the streets of Harlem. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and the guy that purchases trey bags of Heroin off the streets of Baltimore Md or Washington DC? There is no difference, but let me tell you why.

When I "googled" the word "drugs", it was no surprise to find the following: Nicotine-Alcohol-Heroin-Cocaine-Amphetamines-Opiates-Designer Drugs etc, including drugs given for mental disorders. We've all heard of Valium and Prozac and Lithium and Latvian. In 1914 the Harrison Narcotic Act resulted in all opiate-dependent persons be classified as criminals. Although few would label Michael Jackson as a criminal for his drug dependency, several has said he was addicted to pain killers. Most pain killers are derivatives of the opium plant, thus, an opiate just like Heroin. Many prescription drugs are much more potent than heroin and 10 times harder to kick.


Many individuals are saying Michael was nothing more than a typical junkie -- exhibiting all the behaviors of a person lost in a sea of no return. What does a typical "junkie" look like, and what behaviors do they exhibit?


Now hold up before you answer too soon, because I've seen thousands of drug dependent individuals, and many are standing right next to you and you wouldn't know it. I have seen them in person, NOT on TV! That old television feeds us stereotypical images that may do us a disservice. It allows us to point a finger and say NOT ME

The other day I was watching a movie titled "From Hell". It was directed by The Hughes Brothers. You may remember the Hughes Brothers, they did Menace II Society and Dead Presidents. I didn't even know they made that movie. But anyway, I watched the movie while listening to the commentary of one of the brothers, Allen Hughe. He was complaining about the constraints of working for a large studio. He said the studio pulled major advertising dollars after the first week. In short he was crying about the types of movies he wanted to make and why he couldn't make them. Hip-Hop mogul Russell Simmons told him that nobody wanted to hear that. Well, I wanted to hear it. Mr. Simmon's remark did inspired a thought. I wondered why certain people are apposed to hearing a differing view and are quick to reject such as poppycock. I wonder if it has anything to do with the human nature to stay in our comfort zone. Maybe there's an unconscious fear that we might find out we are dead wrong and it may even touch home. Being wrong is uncomfortable. Most will not admit it, but we will protect our right to "be right" and f**k the truth. We will protect out comfort zone. Who gives a f**k about the truth - huh?

The truth is Michael Jackson was not a junkie nor a hype. Michael Jackson suffered from the disease of addiction. Was Betty Ford a junkie or a poor old white women that drank a little too much and happened to take a few pills? I truly believe ( I know) Michael Jackson suffered from a disease that has no cure. Michael Jackson had the incurable disease called addiction. The disease is chronic, progressive and fatal!

"Who wants to hear that Carey, nobody wants to hear that".


Oh yeah, tell me why? ......."Well Carey, everyone knows about cancer and how deadly it can be, but a person that drinks too much or does drugs has only themselves to blame. All they have to do is stop drinking or stop taking drugs".

Damit, that's a good point - a great argument, I never thought of that. Wrong, I lied, I hear that all the time. However, I have to give it to you, it's a good serve. It's a great volley, but it's wide and out of bounds - game/set/ match point. That argument is like a pawn in the game of chess. A pawn my impede the progress of an attack but it's movement are restricted. He will be one of the first pieces to go down.

Is it my move? Is it my serve? What would you say to all the fat and obese people that are eating themselves right to their graves . Heck, all they have to do is stop eating - right? I ain't trying to pick on anyone but what's up with all the fat black people that champion the phrase "fat is beautiful" and frequently blame their fat-ass-ness on being big-bone-did-it? The truth is, they have an addiction for food and everything that goes along with that act. They can't stop eating although they know it's a slow death. Backass-ness and tons of fun may be beautiful to some, but, so might be the coffin they're galloping toward. You can bet your bottom dollar they're in the fast lane to death. That reminds me, what about the thousands of women that stay in abusive relationships? Huh, why do they do that?



"STFU Carey, nobody wants to hear that"


Oh really, tell me why?


That ain't even the same thang Carey, food and drugs are two totally different ballgames" .


Well Mr & Mrs. Tudor Turtle, you better call Mr. Wizard because those remarks are just like the little turtle that thought he wanted to be a knight in shining armor. Later, he found out he was in a game that he knew nothing about and it was time for him to go home. You say food and drugs are totally different. That's exactly my point. For the most part, it's not about the drug or the food. It's about why we abuse ourselves.



Dang it, this post is getting long, I'll have to continue later. The rest of my post will starts like this:

I watched the HBO series The Wire for several years. Now that it has ended, I have thoughts similar to those I possessed during the past election of our 44th President of the United States. I was wondering what it all meant to me.

Many have voiced their perceived ills of the popular series. A frequent discussion centered on the core elements of its storyline: drugs, street violence and corruption. I was reminded of Senate hearings in which proponents of rap and hard rock music stated that listening to such music could lead to suicide and amoral behavior. On the whole, I do not agree with those sentiments; however, like many others, The Wire did affect me.


As we find ourselves standing at the dawn of a new president, a resounding question is, "What can one man really do?". When I juxtapose a similar question into the discussion of Michael Jackson, I wonder what we've learned from his passing. The Wire was just one series. Michael was just one man.


I've once wiped away the tears of a working class wife and mother of three who contracted AIDS from a drug dealer. She was hooked on painkillers and could no longer find a way to satisfy her need for prescription drugs. With little money and less hope, she turned to the streets to satisfy her demons.

I hope someone wants to hear the rest of the story. Even if you don't agree with me, I love differing views and welcome them.

Are we learning anything? Have we learned anything? Well, I believe the answers can be found in our own hearts. When we stop and think about why we continue to do the things that make us unhappy, I think we'll get a better grasps of the horrors of any addiction. It's extremely hard to kick a habit, even when it's slowly but surely killing us. Especially if it makes us feel good.
Kim said...
Michael Jackson's death has saddened me all the way around. First, his death and then the vultures come for his carcas and then all these findings about addiction to painkillers and what not.I've never had an addiction to drugs but years ago when I had surgery my doc prescribed me some painkiller and they sure do make you feel so good and pain free. So I can see how one can easily get addicted. it's just breaks my heart. I hope Michael is indeed resting in peace.


A Free Spirit Butterfly said...
One statement. You're right, what can one man do?Question - what is poppycock? (LOL) I'll google it!In reference to Michael Jackson, he was not a junkie. He was a human being, just like us. We are all God's creatures and some of us have flaws, demons, heartaches, handicaps, etc.... but who are we to judge?Love, peace and blessingsFree spirit


CareyCarey said...
Hello Kim, painkillers are indeed the devils workshop, and thery are getting more addictive every day. There's one called Oxycotin that's the cadilac of death. Many people do not view prescription medication as a drug. They assume that since it's given to them by a doctor it's cool.They will point their fingers at the pot smoker or other opiate addicts and think they will never be "that bad". Denial raises it's ugly head and it's on! A very small percentage ever recovers from opiate addiction (fractions). It's a mean game.I hope we learn something from Michaels passing except how to throw stones.Thanks for stopping by@ Miss Butterfly ...how you doing. Re: "poppycock", well, my spellcheck didn't say a word so It must mean something *lol*I agree with your words about God having the final judgement. I am however hesitant to use that reference because many try to flip the script with that one. If we defined what we were judging, that's our right and our responsiblity. God gave us a free will, so making judgment calls is a must. I know you know what I mean. Thanks for checking in on me. Sometimes I have to do what many others do -- work *smile*.


Solomon said...
Addiction is a mean game, and not many make it out alive. Addiction doesn't descriminate either, as a matter of fact, it is harder on those that are doing OK financially, the way it works then is this, the bigger you are (the more you got) the harder you fall.What gets me with addiction is how people around the addicts enable them to do what they do. Like with MJ, why would those doctors prescribe all those medications to him, knowing full well they are killing him. I mean prescibing drugs to him that are never seen outside of a surgical setting is just plain mess. I saw a tv show about a year ago that was showing different people that had serious overeating/weight problems. This one dude that was featured was a black dude that lived with his sister. The dude weighed 900 lbs and was so rotund he couldn't even get out of bed. This is what I'm talking about when I say there are to many enablers out there. They were interviewing dude, and he was talking all kinds of crazy about what he could eat in one sitting if his sister would just "make it" for him. I won't even go into what he rattled off, it was more food than I eat in a week. He still ate way more than the average person and his family is down in the kitchen cooking him up whatever he is hollerin' for.The real mess came when dude said he had people on "the outside" that would "hook him up" and he showed how he had this rope that he would toss out the window to his boys, and they would run to KFC and pick up a bucket and all the sides which he would then hoist up via the rope and have a feeding frenzie like no other. It was hard to watch I'll tell you, these folks didn't care about anything but the "object of their desire" People are people in all their frailties. Everyone has their faults, and it takes patients and love to see past the things that some people do to themselves and others. Great post Carey!


CareyCarey said...
Solomon, you are right on some many levels. However, the enabler doesn't always know they are hurting their loved one or friend. Frequently the addicted doesn't know very much about their disease (that's a fact), so it goes without question that those around him know even less.Here's a fact that few know about. Opiates do not kill a person unless they overdose. In fact, it is the least harmful to the body of all drugs associated with abuse. Drug abuse and addiction IS a mean game.You brought up a good point. Those with money, status or "normal lives" fall hard because out of fear and ignorance they refuse to accept the fact they have something they can't handle. And, they sure don't want others to know.I remember seeing that fat dude. He was eating whole chickens with all the side dishes. The dude couldn't even wipe his own ass.As I mentioned in my post, many don't want to talk about addictions because it could hit home. They might have to look in the mirror and the "addiction" will not allow that. It's a mean game!


RiPPa said...
Damn Carey, this one was deep; the way you laid it out that is. Personally, I think the stigma attached to drugs and drug abusers is that of the poor man. Being a drug abuser is just one of those things that poor people do.As a result, MJ's affliction may be viewed a little differently because, well, he was rich. Because of this, people will seek to "justify" his drug use or drug of choice: pain medication.In their minds, because of the type of drug and who he was he will not be seen as a junkie. Now to the racist bastards out there, his blackness will make him a junkie just like the rest of us Black people who ALL do dope.What can I say...Perceptions and reality often never match up, do they?Oh BTW: I started watching The Wire when it first came out and I am now full blown junkie. It's a wonder that I even still have my 4 computers and an internet connection at home. Maybe THAT drug is more powerful....


Strongblkwmn said...
Addiction hit my life through my dad, who was an alcoholic. It followed him around until the day he died. He just couldn't shake it. Do I think alcoholism is a disease? Yes I do. I totally agree with Rippa in regards to Michael Jackson.


CareyCarey said...
RiPPa said: "As a result, MJ's affliction may be viewed a little differently because, well, he was rich. Because of this, people will seek to "justify" his drug use or drug of choice: pain medication"
I couldn't have said it better!Yeah RiPPa, sometimes a post doesn't give us enough room to strecth out. I don't know if others appreciated it (or want to read it)but I try to layer my posts. In some of my posts I try to open them -- lay them out and then close them.The Wire IS the shit ain't it! There are so many messages in that series ...Bunk-neighborhoods-corruption (political & police)- Bubbles-money-addiction-preception & reality - family - drugs - disposable black lives.

4 comments:

Moanerplicity said...

"Well, I believe the answers can be found in our own hearts. When we stop and think about why we continue to do the things that make us unhappy, I think we'll get a better grasps of the horrors of any addiction."

That's the problem right there, Carey. I don't think people who do drugs, are addicted to drugs, live lives fueled by drugs, ever find those drugs (of choice) as something that makes them "UNHAPPY."

Sure, they may make those around them unhappy, and those who love them, unhappy and miserable. But the best drugs tend to kill pain, and even things out. The best drugs tend to make the unhapppy forget their pain (whether mental or physical), cares, hardships, sicknesses, etc... and renders them into a state that allows them to experience faux episodes where they are temporarily happy.

I think that's the lure, the appeal, the catch, the hoodoo that undos a junkie.

As for MJ, if, as it has been stated that his use of painkillers came about after that horrific incident where his hair caught fire while filming a Pepsi ad, then he'd been technically a 'junkie addict' for over 25 YEARS! On deeper, more interpersonal level, since his mom, allegedly asked & begged him do the commercial because she wanted his brothers to have an income, then perhaps she even subconsciously blames herself for her son's addiction. And maybe that's a huge thing to live with for anyone, much less, one's mother.

My point is, MJ MUST have been living with some MAD PAIN, both physically and mentally for decades!!!! That and other inner issues would seem to be the perfect storm in creating a lifelong jinkie, would it not?

The steady use and dependance upon all those prescribed, exotic (often uncommon)drugs killed his pain, TEMPORARILY. They made him get up and perform as only HE could, for the masses. They made him forget his life, temporarily. They killed the voice of his insecurities, temporarily. They killed the nagging howl of his inner demons and his personal anguish, temporarily. They nulled his physical pain, temporarily. And in the end, they killed him, permanently.

But I doubt, when under the influence, if they ever made him "unhappy." If, when sober, you live with and exist in unbearable pain, then killing that pain would be the complete opposite of UNHAPPY, would it not?

Thus, lies the predicament of any addict: Feeling good (even by faux means) can sometimes beat the HELL out of feeling LIFE.


One.

CareyCarey said...

Hello Moan,

My professional opinion says you are on the right track. Now, move away from the issue of drugs, and the word junkie. Okay, although you are very close to the solution/problem, you however distanced the average man from their similar problems.

Yes, it is about masking pain. You nailed that one. But only while a person is masking that pain are they at a place of comfort. yet, after a period of time, the masking agent stops doing the trick. AND, they are very unhappy, even while they are doing their drug of choice! They do it because they do not know how to do anything else. It's a habit!

Now we are back to the supposite"non" addict. We mask our pain on a daily basis. Some overeat to a point of killing themselves... slowly. Some people sit around and complain and blame other people for their predicaments. That's a form of masking their pain. Some folks go to a bar for "happy hour". That's masking their pain. Some people have multiple sex partners. They need other folks to make them feel needed. That's masking THEIR pain!

So, when ever someone projects themselves above Michael Jackson, they are missing the point.

And, it's pure nonsense to the 10th degree, tothink one event is the gateway to an addiction.

But one point (you made) is clear(and I agree). Drugs are made for a person to love. They are very effective at their job. Yes, the feelings can be marvelous. They are not made to make a person unhappy. They are made to love . But, the payoff is a Big Bit*h. But the person continues to use them, even when they are killing themselves. But again, it's not about the drug, it's about the emotions of the person.

Think about it, why do you are anyone drink alcohol? I mean, if everything is fine and dandy, why drink?

Moanerplicity said...

Sup again, bruh:

You wrote: "So, when ever someone projects themselves above Michael Jackson, they are missing the point."


Speaking for me: I don't think I would 'project myself over MJ,' or anyone else of any strata, because all human beings have weaknesses, emotions, insecurities and varying coping skills. However, your lure and introduction of this entry dealt with MJ and his demise, and I sorta followed through on that premise.

I will say, that LIVING and FEELING life in all its rapture, joy, agony and pain is difficult to endure, yet millions of people do somehow manage, without the crutch of some opiate to relieve or mask their pain. That's not necessarily a weakness nor a strength, but a testament to the fact that people have various ways in which they process, endure, and manage throughout this dramatic-comic strip called Life.


You also wrote:


"And, it's pure nonsense to the 10th degree, to think one event is the gateway to an addiction."


Hmmmm... OK. On this topic, I would defer to you, because of your personal story, your walk, along with the work you do and the people you see on the regular.


Without knowing anyone else's heart, mind, spirit or soul but my own, I couldn't say exactly what will break a particular person; make someone suddenly or gradually flip a switch or self-destruct.

I do know, from being more than just a casual observer in my walk that certain incidents/traumas in our lives can cause a shift in the way we deal with the world outside of ourselves. Whether we then choose to live in denial, to medicate or meditate (seek a Higher Power)is a choice we must
for make ourselves.

Everyone on this planet has issues, a vice, maybe several, and so, we should be very careful in how we judge others.

BTW: Even though I tend bar, I don't drink. I don't over-eat, don't gamble, and I don't do soft drugs anymore. That doesn't make me a perfect person by any stretch. I DO smoke, and these days that pretty much makes me an OUTLAW in this society.


I see this as a personal weakness, and something I am TRYING to conjure. So, I AM a junkie to the demon nicotine. Anyone who would venture out into a freaking BLIZZARD to cop a pack of cigs has a serious habit! The difference is it doesn't make me dangerous to others (since I don't/can't smoke around non-smokers). It doesn't make me anti-social, undependable, a thief, a con, an emotional blackmailer or other qualities often attributed to addicts. But I do own up to my weakness.

When asked why I do smoke... well... I say because it tends to calm my hyper-activity, lowers my daily stress, makes me flow on a more even vibe when writing... and, well, basically any other faux excuse I can conjure up when folks inquire why I partake in such "a nasty habit". *smiles*


One.

CareyCarey said...

Yeah Moan, we're on the same tip, I just had to stretch out a little.

I mean, the world of addiction is very deep and if it was not, millions would simply leave it behind. Yes, it's about masking pain, regardless of the susbstance or method used to do that.

But last, but not least, an addict is just a person who is addicted to "something". Yet, the drug companies and people in denial, chose to assign that name to the person in the gutter, or crack houses. That's the pimp's trick. I mean, that's the trick of the drug companies, the wine & beer companies and the government. They are pimping the poor sob's as they call the rock smoker an addict. They are laughing at the drinkers as they plug them in the behind. Alcohol is a drug but we call "drinkers" everything except a drug addict. It's the big lie!

Uncle Sam is the big pimp. He gets a cut of everybodies money. And the beat goes on.

Oh, one more thang. You are hurting other people by your smoking habit. Some people love you(I assume), and if your habit shortens your life, you've taken something from them.

Ponder that *smile*