Wednesday, November 4, 2009
LOOK, UP IN THE SKY, IT'S A BLOGGER, IT'S FRANKENSTEIN!!!
First: From yesterday, I do not believe in dreams. They are like oscilloscopes. Their messages are so indecisive, that I am forever left with wanton thoughts. I mean, come on, one minute I'm sitting in church and the next minute I'm fighting Sinbad The Sailor. While fighting Sinbad, John Wayne hands me a Hershey bar. Come on now? Then, the Hershey bar turns into a CD by Wayne Newton. When I try to play the CD, Sammy Davis Jr., snatches it and then runs off with my wife - to the dessert.
Come on now, you make some sense of all that, because I can't! LOL
Now: OH LAWD.... It's FRANKENSTEIN!
While being a guest blogger over at Big RiPPa's house, I ran into Renee, of Womanmusings. We didn't get along very well. Then, just the other day I dropped by another friends spot that I thoroughly enjoy, and you know what, she loves Renee's stuff. Well, I got to thinking, what if I could build me a blogger? No, not from their body parts, but from their mindset. There's a little piece of goodness in everyone, even if I don't think so.
So, I went to work. I thought to myself, who makes me laugh, cry and think? Who skills would I like to emulate and what are the specifics of those skills? Who embodies all the things I enjoy in a person. Of course there is no single person that does not have a few character flaws. So, Frankenstein was born.
When I first started blogging, I was told that it's proper decorum to link a blogger if their name is mentioned. Well, I'm not going to do that today. If you don't like it, lick it *lol*. See, I am sort of a non-conformist, and the people I am going to mention, don't need all of that. Hell, they probably don't even read my blog, so taint that important.
But first, this is kinda tricky. You know, it's like throwing a birthday party for one child and the rest can be heard saying "what about me". But see, that kind of thinking would automatically disqualify a person from being part of my Frankenstein. Maybe I'll save them for Frankenstein's wife. Oooooh, the horror of it all!
One more thing. What if I said the name Hitler? No, he's not a blogger, but doesn't his name conjure a few thoughts? Sure it does, but I'm relatively sure that someone, somewhere, thinks he had some admirable qualities. Okay, if you are a die hard cynic that loves negativity, go stick your head in the sand. I know you feel me. Maybe you don't, but move around nevertheless. I mean..... "YOU" know what I mean.
Okay, for debating skills, I would start with RiPPa and Freeman. I'd take both of them to a bar fight. I don't know if they can fight but I know they'd be in the mix. Freeman is not afraid to voice a view that is totally opposite of the prevailing opinions. I like that. RiPPa makes me laugh while he delivers some hard hitting messages. He's fearless and prepared to support his opinions. I like that. His unique brand of commentary is to die for. Yep, and he loves to eat and Frankenstein needs his nourishment.
I would cut off my hands and attach those of PPR_Sribe's, if I could write like her. Her command of the English language and sentence structure are a gift that few possess. She doesn't do mess, but she is a sister and therefore will cut you if she has to. I like that. She never did learn how to double dutch but she can write. She would be the hands of my Frankenstein.
There's a blogger that goes by the name of MacDaddy. He's about as dry as a neckbone that has been cast aside by a pack of hyena's but he's deadly serious. In a strange way, I admire a guy that never laughs and can sit still, and be quite. I mean, I wouldn't invite him to a party, but there's something to be said about a man that sleeps on the serious said of the moon. My Frankenstein would be well served to have the poise of MacDaddy (RIP).
I was raised in the church, so naturally I was around a lot of church folks. Church folks give the best hugs. Now granted, some of those woman are hugging for all the wrong reason, but they still made me feel good. When I think about jjbrock, over at the Old Black Church, she reminds me of my mother. My mother isn't a cusser, yet, once in a blue moon she might be heard saying "shit on it". That meant forget about it. Anyway, since my Frankenstein has to have a little religion, I have to steal the heart of jjbrock, aka, Ann. Listen, an old Jewish friend was asked why he didn't put his children in a private school instead of subjecting them to the horrors of public schools. He said a person can't learn from running away. BAM! That's jjbrock. She doesn't run from the issues, nor thinks she's too good to talk about them. I like that in her.
Does Frankenstein need love? Sure he does, and that takes me to Mizrepresents & Raw Dog Buffalo. Look at that name, "Raw Dog". Come on now, even Frankenstein likes a little unprotected nookie - right? But see, Mr. Buffalo is a little too graphic for me, but his style is unique. I mean, just the other day he displayed a picture of a guy that had a dong that streaked down to ihs knee cap.... I kid you not. One day he was talking about having sex 4 times a day! Come on now, either he's a big liar or he's someone to be emulated - by some. Although I seldom read much of his stuff, I think my Frankenstein needs some of him... well, because he's nasty - I think? I think some people like being nasty?
Did I mention Mizrepresents? Sure I did, and she has a place in my Frankenstein. Who doesn't want to be sitting on the dock of the bay. I mean, Diane is sitting on the dock of the bay, waiting for her love boat to come in, and she writes about it. Her courage to admit her mistakes and faults, is an admirable quality. She writes about love in all it's splendor. She has a belief in God, and talks about how that belief has sustained her and guided her. My Frankenstein doesn't know where he's going because he doesn't have a brain, but Mizrepresents writes about her hopes and her strong convictions. Just the other day she put a red light in her window. No she didn't, she wrote a post called "Help Wanted". The post was basically about the type of woman she is, and what she needs in a man. I want my Frankenstein to be just like her... No Scrubs Allowed. I like that.
Did I mention that my Frankenstein has African roots. Are you kidding me, he has to have roots in the motherland. In walks TRYBES. He has visited my blog a few times and I was impressed. Although my Frankenstein might appear to be a ugly mess with all the stitches, he still likes to think there's someone for him. So I think ol'Frankenberry is going to speak several languages.
TRYBES brings that African culture and dialect to the table and the boy has swagger.
I thought long and hard on this next one. Since my Frankenstein doesn't have a brain of his own (not yet), he has to be a damn fool. So, what about a time called now? Frankenstein needs to know how to act like a fool. In certain neighborhoods a brotha gotta show his ass. In walks CareyCarey. Now this fool cracks me up. If nothing else I'm going to attach him to Frankensteins laugh box. I've heard the sound of his uncle Kingfish's laughter, maybe he laughs like him. I hope so. I'd like that.
Moving on.... My Frankenstein is a grandfather, and who's heart is better to steal than Keith's @ Keith's Space. He tells those stories that makes me want to go out and kiss a stranger. For real, Keith loves his old school music and is on time - everyday. The man is like my grandfather with this blog thang. Every day of the week my grandfather always went to work. Everyday of the week, Keith writes a post. I like that. My Frankenstein needs discipline
Long Pen has Frankenstein's blood in her. I mean, work with me, she's his granddaughter - okay. Don't think about that too long, because it doesn't make sense but hold on. The blogger Loud Pen, aka Long Pen, is feisty and young. Who doesn't want to be young again? Well, my Frankenstein wants a little of that juice. When I first met Long Pen, she was over in her corner crying like a baby. She was complaining about her status in the blogsphere. She has dreams of being "Beyounce, Ms. Blogbensky". She was told to just settle down and write. It was suggested that she not count the hits or comments, but to make the hits, if only for her own rewards of self expression. See, she stuck and stayed and that's called perseverance. My Frankenstein needs some of that. She's young and admittedly loud, but even ol'skools can learn a little something from those they are trying to mentor. Long pen is the voice of my Frankenstein, loud and brassy and she loves rap music. I like that. My Frankenstein is black, so he has to know how to dance, and I am sure Long Pen can shake her tail feather.
Maybe my Frankenstein is missing a bit of technical knowledge. Maybe I should look at Kit or UglyblackJohn or Field Negro? What about one of those snob blogs? Maybe a chit chat patty wak person? Everybody needs to be able to shuck & jive. Yes, even my Frankenstein.
I need help.
Remember, when you least expect it....... You might become part of my next Frankenstein, or his wife.