Wednesday, October 19, 2011


Hermain Cocaine  Cain!  It's final, now I've seen everything. See, I live in Iowa so I sorta know white folks, but this Hermain Munster Cain is a new Frankenstein. He was in Iowa doing his best slappy white so I had to write about him. He's running for POTUS!

Seriously, I don't do much politics but I turned on my boob tube and that clown was doing the 2011 Buckwheat for president. Really, I couldn't believe my eyes so I set my video recorder. Then, after he was done, I sent the tape to my lab boys and asked them if they could somehow give me back a 3D version. I wanted to see this guy from all angles because something wasn't right.  After a week went by my package arrived. There was a note attached...   "We slowed this down and noticed Mr Cain had a small mic in his ear and something was protruding from his rear end.  We were able to filtered out the words in the small ear piece. They sound like lyrics to a song that some use to get hyped before they go on stage.  here they are: 

I wish I was in de land ob cotton,
Old times dar am not forgotten;
Look away! Look away! Look away! Dixie Land.
In Dixie Land whar I was born in,
Early on one frosty mornin,
Look away! Look away! Look away! Dixie Land.

Those lyrics, written in a comic, exaggerated version of African American Vernacular English, tell the story of a freed black slave pining for the plantation of his birth.

Damn, now my curiosity was on high alert. I couldn't wait to see what was running out of his booty hole. I popped in my remastered 3D video and there it was. I couldn't believe my eyes, it was a tail!  Yicks, a big black funky looking hairy tail was hidden under his jackass suit. But if you haven't seen this guy or heard his  rhetoric,  you better hurry because he's a black republican. And we know what they do with them. Yep, they use them up and throw them away like a dirty scummy dishrag.

Aside from the funky mouth monkey man, here's my basic point of contention:

Raise your hands in the air if you just don't care. Or, wave the flag for Ms Palin or any old Mr Charlie & his wife, or any ol'negro?

Let me cut to the chase. Some negros and political blogs should change their names to BootyForSell.

That's right, they should flash a red sign and adorn it with big purple lips - and a big fat booty. You know, them big booty lips that compliment deep ass kissing. But wait, dez some smart negros that may not know the errs of their ways. I mean, they have great writing skills - that most would die for - but many of them ain't talking about a damn thang except what Obama has "allegedly" done wrong. And, Mr Cain was the past CEO of a huge national pizza chain.

Listen, I am a ride or die Obama supporter that....


No, you hold up, and you can miss me with that one. I mean, you should define hero worshiping. I know you may believe that's a clever phrase, but it's nothing more than a tired and trite remark that allows you to run from the truth. Get back to me with your definition of a hero worshiper.

But first, tell me, who would you rather have in office, Obama, or any ol' nondescribt Mr Charlie? I know most of my wayward friends will have a hard time answering that question. Well, since they claim to be supporting Obama's mission, they can't say, "we love Mr Charlie". On the other hand, if they say Mr Charlie, I'd say "give me his name". Who, Herman The Munster Cain... with the funky tail feather, or any pasty face Betty Crocker? Who would be a good replacement? And, since I am referring to smart negros, they wouldn't say anybody except President Obama. I mean, that reply would instantly discredit them. And lord knows what that would do for their egos.

That reminds me, I believe much of the wayward negros whimsical hater-aid (conscience of not) is rooted in an ego that's in grave need of constant stroking. What else could justify their negative rants about our presidents?

"But Carey, we can't give him a pass just because he's black"

Who said anything about a pass you knuckle head? Again, if not Obama than who?! See, some folks wish to run from that question, while they hurl ambiguous quasi- intellectual short burst of nothingness.

Really, that's the big elephant in this house "who would my naysay negro friends chose as a replacement". If you can't stop the elephant, then your house will become very raggedy. And, we all heard what Malcolm said:

"if your kitchen is dirty, your house is dirty"
So, would it be right to invite someone to dinner and feed them Cracker Jacks? Wouldn't that be kind of dirty? Well, inside a box of Cracker Jacks, there's always a surprise. But I am still wondering who they would bring to the table.

 Who?... Any ol'cracker-Jack?

Remember, the elephant is still there. He ain't going to disappear because the question is side stepped. Consequently, until the chicken head naysayers can tell me the purpose behind their eloquent dissing of President Obama, I can't help but believe they are unconsciously soothing a soul that needs to sound intelligent. More importantly, they have to know their words are a cheap cloned edition of Mr Charlie's. I wish they would just speak the truth and come out of the closet. I wish they would change their names to Black Booty For Sale: The place of intelligent BIG BOOTY for your Disposal.

"But again carey, we can't give Obama a pass because he is black, we have to make him accounting"

Okay, one mo gin for all the circle jerks. Do you really think you are making him accountable by mimicking the words of his arch rivals?! I mean, really? Do you think you're making him accountable by sitting at home or at a blogspot, with a bunch of negros that acquired their political science degrees on-line  or off the 10 o'clock news? I mean, what's accomplished by listening to rants, half-baked solutions, haters and naysayers - huh? Surely that's not making him accountable. That's nothing more than a game of spades or dominoes. Any negro can sit around a table and talk trash. I mean, making him accountable??? Tell me, tell me exactly how you're doing that? I mean, considering the un-focused willy-nilly rhetoric that's the final product of most political discussions, I find it hard to believe it's a package that would make the president accountable. Having said all of that, in the very least; would your words move people toward Obama or move them away from him? Don't duck now, but the BIG ASS ELEPHANT is still in the house. If not Obama than who? Think about it. Play the story to the end.

I know this post will not get me invited to soft music and satin sheets, but as Martin Luther King said,

"Many people fear nothing more terrible than to take a position which stands out sharply and clearly from the prevailing opinion. The tendency of most is to adopt a view that is so ambiguous that it will include everything and so popular that it will include everybody"

So please, don't take this personally, but negro please, let your conscious be your guide.

Hey, if a person cannot truly define what they are receiving from voicing their dis-pleasures of our president, I'd be a fool to engage them in any form of debate or discourse.
I raise my hand. I've been at a place in my life where I didn't know why I blamed others, chided others, pointed fingers, and went to places  (mentally and physically) I had no business going.

I would imagine that many people are stuck in that dilemma, and possibly, don't know how to get out. It's very hard to say I was wrong and you were right.  However, there's no mistaking the fact that the Herman Cain Thang is a pied piper - donkey - for hire. He's a fool who thinks the name "Republican" will get him in the cabin in the skies of Washington DC.  I am not a gambling man, but I'd bet this new jack negro gets fried like a cheap piece of lunchmeat.


jjbrock said...

Carey have you Read his bio? He claim growing up he was willing to do whatever and anything it took to gather money. That idea is still woking today for him.

I would like to think he's a wonderful fit for the Republican Party. Any body who's willing to be the "token negro" is worthy of it.

CareyCarey said...

Hello Ann,

First, my son is out so now we're going through.

Now, after seeing this guy do his thang, I don't believe he thinks he's the token negro. I think he see's his self a the new messiah that's gonna lead the lil chillen to the promise land. This dude was talking about negros need to get off the Democratic plantation. He was sorta talking in a preachers cadence. But what surprised me was his "win" here in Iowa. I mean, don't get me wrong, the other fools on the ticket were a real gaggle of fools but nevertheless, this is not a state that welcomes "outsiders". But from what I saw, he's doing a real good 2011 buck dance... "massa, dem other darkies don't know how good we's have it, I'll show'em"

On the token negro tip, I worked in a industry in which blacks were few and far between. In my place of employment, out of roughly 200 men that worked in my profession(in my area), only 5 were black. So you know I caught hell on the daily. Anyway, one day I bumped into a brother from another company and I asked him how it felt to be the lone brother and if he experienced any problems with the white guys. You know, the usual snide remarks (and racial slurs), and being ordered to do things that other men should be doing. He said (without shame) "are you kidding me, I like being the only "nigga", I don't want another brother messing up my thang"

Now that's a good "token negro" and he loved it! Maybe Mr Cain feels the same way, huh?

2cute4u said...

Kinda been a while..
I had so much fun reading..
Carey Carey,what motivates you?

CareyCarey said...

Hi 2cute4them,

That's a good question and one I'd be more than happy to answer. But first (so i'll know where we're going) tell me why you're asking the question(you know, what you're looking for). Then I'll come back and lay it all on the line.

kid said...

You're a good writer.
A lot of people don't get that the Koch Brothers and their buddies don't play. It cost the POTUS $650 million to get in office and the right is going to raise more than that to try and get rid of him. Doon't people notice the pile on? He kills a fly and Michelle Malkin calls PETA on him and they respond. the Republicnas aren't playing. They distroyed ACORN and tried to destroy the Union, Shirley Sharrod, and the NAACP. We got one year to go to make the Republican Party a bad memory to people.

CareyCarey said...

Kid, my man, it's been a second.

Thanks for the compliment. I try to write in a style that's non traditional, while moving a serious message.

But yeah, some folks do not look at the big picture, nor the motives behind their action and those you mentioned.

Yes, as you implied, this is a big issue and we have 1 year to go.

As a popular song says... "if you [we] think your lonely now, wait until tonight. [If things go wrong and Mr Charlie gets back in the house] :-)