Tuesday, December 27, 2011

SERENA WILLIAMS: Love Don't Love NObody!

A few days ago Serena Williams said "I am done dating for 10 years".  Oh me oh may, didn't she read Steve Harvey's Book "Think Like A Man And Act Like A Man"?  I mean, I didn't read Steve's book but I am sure there must have been a chapter titled "Love'em and Leave'em".  C'mon now, look at that picture --  there's a whole lotta lovin' goin' on. But seriously, as the story goes, Serena is taking a break after dating the likes of rappers Common and Drake. She said she gave it her all but they and it was  another love TKO, and she got hurt in the process.

WELL WELL WELL -- it looks like love don't love nobody or money can't buy you love? I mean, on the surface it appears Serena has the perfect package. She doesn't do drugs, has a body to die for, and has a job that pays very well. We're talking ugly money. So what's the problem?

Well - I ain't trying to be all Steve Harvey-ish, but I think I see where she may have made her move too soon. Listen, I am not trying to drop salt on Common and Drake because I really don't know the dudes, but I really don't think they're the long-term -- long relationship -- marrying type...  if you know what I mean.

Listen, I don't believe dating by the numbers -- as Steve Harvey's Book would suggest, but there are a few things women need to know about some men. 1.)  Variety -- for some men -- is the spice of life. Seriously,  in the professions of Drake's and Commons', women scream "DO ME BABY-ALL NIGHT LONG". That's right, temptation is a bi*ch and most men don't read the bible. So, although I am not calling Ms. Williams a fool, it's a fools errand to hookup with a man who has lipstick on his collar and his pillow, and that lipstick is not your brand.

But wait, lets back up. Aretha Franklin said: Take me to heart and I'll always love you

And nobody can make me do wrong

Take me for granted, leaving love unsure

Makes will power weak and temptation strong

A woman's only human

You should understand

She's not just a plaything

She's flesh and blood just like her man

If you want a do-right-all-day woman

You've got to be a do-right-all-night man

They say that it's a man's world

Well you can improve that by me

And as long as we're together baby

Show some respect for me ~ Aretha

UT OH, forget about Steve "big mouth" Harvey, Aretha is singing the black women's anthem. If you wanna do right woman  - fellas-  you gotta be a do right man. But wait, what does that do for the black women. I mean, there's plenty of do right -- all tight -- er'night black women, but where are all the do right men? Maybe that's why Serena threw her hook in the fast track bin of Drakes and Commons - huh?

But didn't somebody say "I can do bad all by myself"?  Yeah, right, that's easier said than done -- I think? I wonder if Serena could find love and happiness in the arms of the man who works a Quik Shop or one who drive a bus?  In fact, I wonder if most black women are too image conscious to date a fat garbage man who their friends would not approve of? You know, the dude could be nice, very clean and have no children, and thus, no babies momma problem, but he just didn't have that "status" thang going on -- I bet some black women walk on by?  Anyway, I wonder how long Serena will stay on lock down?

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Bishop Eddie Long, Steve Harvey and Tyler Perry: Pimps up and hoes down.

Welcome all you facebook travelers and Google-ooglers. Click on the thang and have a few laughs. If you don't think it's funny, you're probably a member of New Birth MBC. But don't shoot the messengers. I'm just presenting the news *smile*

If you enjoyed this little humorous clip, there is another that you might enjoy. It's an interview of Eddie Long *wink*... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o-hDu7wqQk0&feature=player_embedded

Sunday, December 18, 2011


It's crying time again you're gonna leave me, I can see that far away look in your eyes. I can tell by the way you hold me darling, that it won't be long before it's cryin' time.

I borrowed those words from a popular song to set the tone for this post. Well, the following piece is one of my journeys. It includes mommas and drama... a whole lot of drama. This was originally submitted in four parts. I've combined them into one post.

If a women has children by different men, what is she? Some are quick to call her a scank or a ho. Others might say she's a woman of low principles. Let me tell you a story and I'll tell you what I call them. I have a definition that's counter to popular opinion.

This story is about a man and a women that fell in love. Do you like a good love stories - I do. Like most love stories, there's a beginning, a middle and the end. This story begins with a man that had lived a few years and a young beautiful black women that was just leaving her nest. They met in the military; he a fast talker, slick walker. She was a young innocent girl out to see the world. He had a history. In fact, he was denied entry into one branch of the military because of past criminal behavior. He was young but the streets called him at an early age. Being of a criminal mind and no ones fool, he found a way to slip into a different branch of the armed forces.

Since he considered himself a lover and not a fighter and wasn't going to shoot anyone, he wiggled his way into the cool confines of office life. He felt like one of the Beverly Hillbillies ....swimming pools, movies stars AND air conditioning. Life was good, he had a first hand view of all the new women that arrived on the base. Aside from greeting them at the door, their records preceded them. At first he felt kind of funny looking at their past but he rationalized that feeling by telling his-self it's his job to make sure all their records were in order - it was one of his duties.

He came from the streets so he'd witnessed all the pimps and hustlers trying to lay their magic on women, but his thang was different. An old player told him that women love sincere men that make them smile. So his thang was sincerity with a smile and a pinch of dishonest ....just a pinch. He knew that most women felt isolated in the military and longed for home. Well, while looking through their records to see if they had any ...ahhh, any ...ahhh, things he didn't want to catch, he would look to see what high school they attended and the city they were from.

He was a clever old fox. While greeting them at the door he would extend his hand and then quickly pull it back with a startled look and say, "Helen Lampkin, German Town High School, women you haven't changed one bit". The ice was broken, the women was comfortable with her lost and found homie. Now, he still had work to do but friends before lovers was the name of the game, and two friends had found each other on a lonely military base.

One such women tweaked his heart along with his love of hide and go seek. She was a city girl that walked with a long stride that said, I know I look good and you can't have any. Her shoulders were back and her chin was slightly tipped up. She had heard all the lines. Women like that don't have to sleep alone. The old wolf knew he had to come with a new game. He decide just to be sincere without any lies. He told her what he generally did when anticipating a new arrival but that he just want to be straight up with her. He told her that he just wanted to meet her and he didn't want to start a friendship off with a lie. She paused and asked him if he looked in her medical records. He looked deep into her eyes and told her that he had not - he lied but the relationship blossomed :-). Hey, he was a wolf, okay.

Life was good, they were the talk of the base. They drove around in a brand new block long Oldsmobile Ninety Eight that she helped him pay for. They yelled out the windows at the other soldiers and turned up their music to blast Marvin Gay .....what's going on .....what's going' on.

They were in love. There was only one problem. This wolf turned serious lover had another lover - back home ...a child too.

Love is a funny thang, it doesn't divide in equal parts, well, not exactly.

This is part 1 of Baby Momma Drama ....Don't turn that page.

We all can rationalize our bad decision and give excuses why we committed errors in judgement. I don't wish to live in the past but I do not ever want to forget why I may have chosen a wrong path.

Even though I may have given the impression that I was promiscuous in my early years of military life, I was not. The military is much like any job or career. The workday has set hours and one goes to work and then goes home. Many military bases are like small rural communities. Some are in isolated areas. Even though I spoke of meeting women upon their arrival at the base, there were not many women.

I went in the military to start a new life. But as my mother would say, if you play with a puppy, it will lick you in the face. My father's version was, if you sit in a barbershop you will eventually get a haircut. I fathered a child as a teenager and her mother was waiting for me back home. We had planned a life together yet I was in the arms of another women. I was hesitant about telling this part of my story because there remains a sense of guilt that I hurt others by my selfish ways. The shame and guilt goes away when I address the issues and honestly accepted my wrongdoings. When I jacked up my slacks and said I messed up, I can then move on. But to share my story and my pain with others is a new journey. The road is tough when the fingers of fault are pointing directly at me. However, I've grown tired of many depicting mothers with children by different men as some sort of women with flawed character or low morals. I was involved with two wonderful women that just happened to run into a guy like me.

While playing house with my new lover we brought another child into the world. I wasn't man enough to tell either of the women about each other so I maintained two separate lives. I was close enough to my home town that I could drive home when I choose to do so. I lived this lie for 2 years until everything came tumbling down. I had become so comfortable with living like this that I even drove my second family to my parents home to let them visit with their new grandchild. I put them in an awful position. My father would give me the look of deep concern and ask me what the hell I was doing. My mother was force to take the route of don't ask don't tell. Everyone paid a price when the news broke.

After visiting my parents one weekend, I decided to stop at a local horse racing track. My skills at picking winners wasn't very good so I decided to leave after the 5th race. I was with Rita* (*name changed) and my son. As we approached the car a voice said, "how are you doing Carey", it was Debbie*, the mother of my first child. She had a gun in her hand, a 2 shot derringer. I was stunned, I walked toward her. My son ran behind me saying daddy daddy. He didn't know there was danger, he just couldn't understand why I was walking off from him.

At that moment my life changed and so did the lives of several others.

To be continued ........... Part 3 coming

This piece was written as a series for http://coparenting101.org/.

The blogs mission if to have a place where co-parents can share their struggles of co-parenting - "the new father/the old ex/the new girlfriend/dating/ visitations, etc,.

Co-parenting is like the game of Tic-Tac-Toe; the game with the 9 squares. The square in the middle is the key. But unfortunately some parents always want to be the "ex" in the middle. The game is won when three "X's" or three "O's" are all aligned in one row, not when the ex is in the middle. It doesn't matter if they are aligned diagonally, across or up and down, they just need to be in line. But some parents are like the actor that wants to write the screenplay, build the props, and direct all the other players in their own way. They desire to be the "ex" in the center square at all cost. The co-parent turned director unknowingly turns a nice family movie into a horror flick. They stay stuck in the middle square failing to grasp the concept of a team player - family player. Tic-Tac- OH NO! Although the center square can be key to winning the game, the game can be won without it.

There I was, stuck in the middle. A man that had walked a tightrope of life was about to fall down. I was stuck between a gun wielding women and another woman lost in disbelief. Debbie's eye left mine and slowly traveled to the child running behind me. She looked back at me and then back to the child. Her face said it all, she realized that was my son. Her eyes swelled with tears. Rita was behind me calling my name.

Debbie was by no means the type of woman to carry a gun. Years later I asked her what she was going to do with the gun, she said, shoot your ass! I asked her why she didn't do it. She said, what kind of woman would she be if she shot a man while a crying child ran behind him saying, daddy daddy. I then asked her where she got the gun and she said, your brother.

I think it's safe to assume that many have a few choice names for me. I do not think it would be a stretch to include louse and jerk, and I would agree. However, in defense of myself, I would rather have been a wolf, a pig or a dog than to presently be a bad parent. I am not saying it's okay to be bad person or to have been a bad person. I think it's wiser to learn from our mistakes and grow through them. Some individuals are lousy husbands and dreadful wives yet good parents. Many people can not live with another person or at least their ex. Some didn't know how to love another until a child came into their lives. To a large degree, my story is no different than any other co-parent. There's a relationship or relationships that didn't work out. We can start right there. Who was at fault? Does it really matter?! Who's the judge of righteousness?

Parenting is not a reflex move - our emotions control us. We are the only animals on earth that get up by alarm clocks, and not because we are no longer sleepy. We drink several bottles of water because someone said it's the right thing to do, not because we are thirsty. We do so many things on the advice/words of others. Frequently they no nothing about us, nor our predicaments.

I had two great parents. My father has passed away. My father was the best man I've ever known. Not simply because he was my father, just because he was a good man. After my father passed away, I found out that he too had an affair. In fact, he also had a child by another women. The man was about the same age as my older brother. I came across this information by accident when a person asked me why I didn't attend my brother's funeral. I knew "my" brother had not died so I went to my mother to ask questions. They say the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. My father made a few mistakes as a young man and I knew nothing about them. Had my mother used this information in a spiteful way, it could have affect the whole family dynamics. There's a valuable lesson in my mother's silence. I think it's important that the child make the determination of the character of the man and it should not come from the mouth of the other parent - it serves no purpose.

The Momma drama continues....

Standing between two women, I was riddled with shame and guilt, I didn't know what to do. Debbie dropped her head and walked away. Rita was furious. I picked up my son and walked toward the car. It was a five hour drive back to the military base. Rita lived in base housing. I frequently stayed there several nights. We were not married, I had an apartment off base. That night I stayed at my apartment. The next day, after talking with Rita, I drove back to my home town to talk with Debbie. She said not to come but I went anyway.

To be continued ....... The final cut is coming up.

This piece is part of a series written for http://coparenting101.org/.
The blog's mission is to provide a place for those going through the struggles of co-parenting to share their stories and to maybe find answers. Many issues are examined - the new father/the new girlfriend/dating/problems with the ex/visitations, etc,.

This 4 part post was written for a series @ http://coparenting101.org/

I do not profess to be an expect on women's emotions. I am not a psychologist. looking back over my life, I've often wondered why the two women in my life didn't treat me differently upon finding out my secret. At that time, neither of them shut the door on me or called me dirty names. I continued to live a life with two families.

A day came when I had to make a choice. Obviously at that time I had not matured and I was trying to take the easy way out by having either Rita or Debbie make the choice for me. But neither ran off and I had to grow up. I honored my commitment with Debbie and we eventually got married. We were together for nearly 35 years. She has passed away after a battle with cancer. Looking back, I've come to appreciate how strong these women were and how they played a vital role in the development of our children.

Rita took an early discharge from the military and vanished with my son. At that time the emotional journey was too much for her to handle. My wife was sympathetic to her pain and that of mine. I had "lost" a son and she insisted that I find them. I was able to track them down through military channels. They were living in a state far from mine. The following years were a learning process.

When a person decides to entertain the overtures of another, they are attracted to that person and not necessarily the children that come along with them. Frequently the issues of co-parenting involves the new wife or the new girlfriend.

On the ex-husbands side, it involves the new husband or the new boyfriend. Divorce rates are up and families are not staying together as long as they did in days gone by. Men can be possessive and so can women. The new lovers are often intimidated by a good relationship between the ex's. Frequently, depending on the reasons behind the breakup, the old spouse has been known to oppose visit, or limits visits to the house of the ex-husband or wife while "she's" there.

Debbie told me later in our marriage that she always thought Rita was more attractive than her. She also said that since Rita had my first born son (had another son with Debbie later) that my sense of responsibility to that boy would drive me away. I learned these things later in our marriage. I also learned that was one of the reasons she agreed to let my son come and live with us for periods longer than summer vacations {less visits to her house}. I never really knew women as much as I thought I did. Some of my son's high school years were spent with us; summers with his mother. He played on a state championship football team.

I never faced the drama of the "other" women making demands. I think it was partly because the women were mature adults and had compassion and respect for each others dilemma. More so, I now believe it had something to do with the father's in their own lives. Each had a different story. Debbie's father left the home when she was a child. There were issues in Rita's childhood as well. Hence, they knew the importance of having a father in a child's life even though co-parenting puts a strain on those dynamics.

I've come to believe it's just as important that a good man be in the life of a young girl. I've met women who have said they've never been around good men, including their fathers, and therefore, thought all men were the same - bad. Debbie and Rita were never in each others company although they had to talk to each other on the phone.

Of course children try to throw parents into the middle of their compliants, mine were no different. Once my son called Rita to tell her that Debbie had "spanked" him. Well, Rita told him that if he ever calls her again in regards to Debbie spanking him, that she was going to tell her to spank him again - for her. Another time my son called his mother and told her that I made him walk to school. I never got a ride to school and thought the distance wasn't too far. She called me and asked about his situation. I told her I might have been living in the past "boy, I walked 10 miles to school" and decided to change my view. It was a pretty long distance. So I decided to buy him a bicycle. He said he would never be caught dead riding a bike to school; that was for nerds. The bike was relagated to short runs to the store and he walked to school ....he didn't die.

As I mentioned, I look back and have regrets that I didn't voice my appreciation more than I did. I was never around other co-parents, yet these days I hear the same arguments from the ex-husband or ex-wife. "The new wife is not fit to have their child around her son". It's weird because even if the children love being around the new mate, for some strange reason the ex's are not having it. Although I am not a doctor, I have my opinion why this may happen. Rita called me one day and said, "so, you have a big house, is it bigger than mine?" . In the early years of our co-parenting, I guess my son made the crucial mistake of saying something nice about my home and Debbie. Heck, I had to purchace a larger home when the children started eating more and getting bigger. Before the new purchase it was no big deal for boys and girls to sleep in the same room. But when my daughter started to develope, we knew it was time to make a change.

I don't know how this goes in other co-parenting households, but it was a sticky issue in mine. I don't know if women are more comfortable thinking the other women is a poor mother that doesn't clean her home? But it's been my experience that women don't want to hear anything good about the other women.

The problems of co-parenting are not solely related to the relationship of the parents. We thrust children together that have different parents or at least one different parent and expect them to get along just fine. More times than not, this is not the case. Children can be cruel. My son once told me that Debbie's children told him that his mother tried to steal "their" father from their mother.

Also, my children by Debbie once told me that I let Rita's son get away with murder. I wonder if we do that? I wonder if we overly protect the child that is away from his other parent? I do know that Debbie went out of her way to show love to my son. She would ask him what dinner he would like for her to cook and I will never forget, it was tuna casserole. Every time it was tuna casserole. I never liked tuna casserole.

Today I am a grandfather. Looking back, I probably would change some things. But I wonder what I would change and if that would be a good thing. I was watching the movie "Benjamin Button" and there was a scene that stuck in my mind. It was a scene in which one of the characters was hit by a moving car. In the movie, the viewer had a chance to see all the different factors involved in reaching one defining moment in life. For instance, what would have happened if the driver of the car hadn't stop to pick up a package? Also, the women that was hit by the car was detained in her apartment. What would have happened if she hadn't misplaced her keys?

Maybe most events happen for a reason. Maybe my purpose in life is to tell my story. I've made a lot of mistakes and maybe others can learn from them. I love being a father and there's nothing I would change about that.

It's hard telling a story in which others are involved and try to keep their anonymity. Sometime we want to share the good parts of our lives. I wanted to share a little something but I don't want people going up to a man and telling him that he knows this and that about his mother or his father. So, one of the sons by one of the women in this story is presently playing quarterback in the NFL. I wouldn't change a whole lot about my life, including co-parenting.

I miss my father. If he was alive today I'd look forward to calling him and telling him thank you for being a good dad.

Thanks for reading along.

A Free Spirit Butterfly said...
I was trying to sneak in a comment at work and accidentally posted a Father's Day greeting on the wrong post. I think it went to Mz. Jackson...Anyhoo, Love ya and wishing you a very HAPPY FATHER's DAY!Free Spirit!

Keith said...
Man this was an incredible story..I held off commenting until the entire story wa told.. A lot of times when I read you,I feel like except for a few details, I'm reading my own story...I too know about Air Force life and women and the problems that come along with both...This was very insightful and I hope it ispired at least one young reader out there..It was certainly a story that needed to be told. Big Up's to you man..for being more man than a lot of these cats out here! You were blessed to have two wonderful women in your life..That's more than a lot of guys ever get (or deserve)Happy Father's Day to you, (From one Grandfather to another :)

Opinionated Diva said...
Totally agree with Keith...incredible story. I literally said, "wow" out loud at the end.Takes strong people to co-parent and maintain their sanity...your wife was an amazing woman.

Blu Jewel said...
Having been decieved by my mother as a child into me thinking my stepfather was my biological father, I have a lot of respect for Debbie who encouraged you to find your son and have a relationship with him. I was 5 when I finally met my biological father and even though he and I grew pretty close, there was a lot he did to fail me over the years she shared. I later found out that I not just the two children I grew up with at his house, but 5 other siblings; whom I didn't meet until late in my life; save for the eldest whom I met when I was about 13.I think it's important; regardless of how the child was conceived that he/she be afforded a relationship with their parent. I think it's cruel and unfair to use adult drama as a tool and a means to manipulate or hurt the other parent. I'm happy that your situation worked in your favor in the end and that you were able to have and maintain a relationship with all your children.Love to live; live to love!

blackwomenblowthetrumpet.blogspot.com said...
Hi there!Thanks for sharing this!Wow...I commend you for finding your son and for maintaining a relationship with your children.You said:"I've come to believe it's just as important that a good man be in the life of a young girl. I've met women who have said they've never been around good men, including their fathers and therefore thought all men were the same - bad."I encounter so many black women who have had negative experiences with men - beginning in their childhoods. Many of them to feel a bit of resentment that I don't share that history. My parents got married BEFORE having children, and were degreed professionals BEFORE having children. My father wanted his children. He loved being a dad. There was no "oooops I'm pregnant!" aspect of the way he encountered fatherhood. His encounter with fatherhood was COMPLETELY intentional.I think that is a huge factor with most black men... how they encountered fatherhood and if they actually SOUGHT parenthood.As for the situation with the women... I think that men need to be EXTREMELY careful not to become involved with a woman who will not treat his children as HER OWN. Sooo often, a brotha will be enamored with a sista who is devoted and affectionate and committed but she really doesn't have those same feelings for his children. She politely tolerates them because they are part of the package...and this always surfaces later on in the relationship.Happy belated Father's Day.Peace, blessings and DUNAMIS!

Maxine said...
This is a beautiful post, Carey. It is honest, and real, and confronts issues all of us are dealing, or will probably deal with, in our lives. It's rare that men speak honestly about these things, particularly in an open forum. And while the preacher in me wants to chastise your infidelity, the reality is that monogamy is often an unrealistic aspiration, and who knows if it was even meant to be...

Friday, December 16, 2011


Lippy The Lion & Hardy Har Har are a pair of Hanna-Barbera cartoon characters, a lion in a tattered top hat and vest, and a hiena in a pork pie hat and bow tie, respectfully. Hardy is the eternal pessimist that suffers from a major depressive disorder. Lippy, on the other hand, was the stereotype of someone in which hope springs eternal, hence, “lippy”.

Their cartoons revolved around ever-hopeful Lippy with reluctant Hardy serving as his sidekick. Whatever their journey, Hardy's words were always the same "Oh me, oh my, oh dear". Hardy had little faith. Consequently, he always lived in fear.

Let's see, you make the call; are you Judas, Brutus or Hardy Har Har , or can I depend on you?

Well, here’s where I am at today.

There are few things that I really hate, but I can not stand monkey see monkey do negros that proclaim they are standing with you, side by side, shoulder to shoulder in troubling time, yet at the first sign of trouble, they are gone like a turkey through the corn. And, of course, they frequently take along like minded fence straddlers.

Let me explain. Here we are at the mid-point of president Obama’s first term in office. I am reminded of his message of change and the words of - what has turned out to be - his quasi supporters. You know, the ones that have taken off their badge of courage and exposed the underbellies of their real nature; a stankin pig and a funky black cat. You know the story... “Who will help me make the bread“ he asked?... “Not I,” said the pig. . ... .“Not I,” said the cat. ... “Then I'll do it myself,” sputtered the baker.

For sure, all the funky black cats, stinking pigs and Hardy Har Har's of the world are now crying “oh me, oh my, oh dear” as they jump on their new bandwagon of “I told you so”. I’ve been seeing their Step n Fetchit asses as they throw down their signs of “we shall overcome", and then, pickup their new sign “massa, can we come back home

Change came, but their hearts and their fears were not ready for the uncovering of the new-jack racism and cunning ways of Obama‘s detractors  that have raised their ugly heads. It was always there - yet somewhat dormant - but now alive and kicking. So now all the funky black pigs have taken on the persona of their master. They bemoan the alleged errs of President Obama in an attempt to fall back in the ever so comfortable graces of their beloved Mr. Charlie.

The harshest criticism always seems to come from those that have no idea of the political process, nor the duties or restrictions of the presidency, and truly have no gift of their own. And are the epitome of a do or die cynic that’s just plain pissed off at their station in life. That is of course, unless you’re making the world a little more ugly, then that type of personality, will gladly hold your hand and dance through the stankin muck filled trappings of life, proclaiming that you, just like they, see only how awful it all is, but take pleasure in the celebration of it. Lord knows we've heard their pitiful cries... “lets get rid of Obama, we need change”. Negro please, didn’t I here that before? But now your ass wants to scurry backwards on the underground railroad.

Btw, you know (don’t you) the braves slaves, while traveling through the underground byways, shot the weakling slave that wanted to turn around. They couldn’t risk the chance of them persuading other slaves that bondage was the light. More importantly, there is no doubt the weak slave - back peddling slave - upon arriving back at his place of comfort would point fingers at the escaping slaves and sing...

I wish I was in de land ob cotton,
Old times dar am not forgotten;
Look away! Look away! Look away! Dixie Land.
In Dixie Land whar I was born in,
Early on one frosty mornin,
Look away! Look away! Look away! Dixie Land.

Dar's buck-wheat cakes an 'Ingen' batter,
Makes you fat or a little fatter;
Look away! Look away! Look away! Dixie Land.
Den hoe it down an scratch your grabble,
To Dixie land I'm bound to trabble.
Look away! Look away! Look away! Dixie Land.

But in the end, Sam Cooke and Martin Luther King said it best.

A Change Is Gonna Come

"I was born by the river in a little tent. Oh and just like the river I’ve been running ever since. It’s been a long, a long time coming. But I know a change gonna come, oh yes it will. It’s been too hard living but I’m afraid to die, cause I don’t know what’s up there beyond the sky. It’s been a long, a long time coming, but I know a change gonna come, oh yes it will. I go to the movie and I go downtown, somebody keep telling me don’t hang around. But I know a change gonna come, oh yes it will. Then I go to my brother and I say brother help me please, but he winds up knocking me back down on my knees!"

Many people fear nothing more terrible than to take a position which stands out sharply and clearly from the prevailing opinion. The tendency of most is to adopt a view that is so ambiguous that it will include everything and so popular that it will include everybody -- Rev Martin Luther King, Jr.

Yes, it's true, fear and faith can not co-exist in the same heart and some negros fear the mountain. They will never find the faith to say "verily I say unto you, who so ever shall say unto this mountain, be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; and shall not doubt, and it shall be done"

Even the cowardly lion found the strength to pass through the yellow brick road.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011


I was going to say negros get ready, but I didn't want some N-WORD-ERS getting mad at me. But check this train-of-thought. And remember, it's just my opinion. But hold on, cuz there IS a train coming.

Her Excellency EJS President of Liberia was recently in the states visiting a friend of mine. It was sort of a book promotion thing. I didn't know that much about Liberia. Well, Okay, I thought Marcus Garvey was the president of Liberia. Didn't he swindle a few black people with a promise of new Cadillacs, in a new land? Wait, maybe that was Daddy Rich. Dang it, that's not even right. That was Richard Pryor... wasn't it? Anyway, all I know is some negroes got together and got on a big boat and went to Africa. Don't get mad at me for saying negroes because I'm just trying to be historically correct. I can't say some niggas got on a boat. Some negros might get upset. I mean we were called negroes, okay. Yep, sambos, darkies, niggers and negroes. Hey, I didn't make up the word. I'm reminded of the time I had to fight a brotha because I called him black. So please, you say afro, some say negro, and some say the N-word. So lets wait for another personality to use the N-WORD before we go downstairs to that smoky juke joint. I'd rather sit in a tub of frog spit than debate that NeverEndingStory.
OuuuuWeeee, it's too too tuff for me.

But see, in all seriousness, I was lost about the history of Liberia. So I asked my friend a few questions about the country, the president and her book. Mocha, from "In the Cafe with Mocha television show" was the presidents host. This was her reply :

"You should definitely try the book, Liberia has a very interesting history and she does a great job of laying the foundation so that you really understand the underlying reasons for their 14 year war.

She is a very cool lady, very intelligent and warm. She was on the John Stewart Show on Thursday and actually made him a Chief"

See, I didn't know anything about a war. Well, I sort of heard about wars in Africa but I just throw them all in the same pot. I am not trying to be funny. I am sure there are many that keep a keen eye on the current events in the homeland but I have to be honest and say... I am not the one. I could fake it like the Wizard of Oz. But I'd be a fake, just like the Wizard of Oz. And who likes a faky jake... I don't. So, I asked a few more questions, she replied:

"Carey, the war was in its most simple explanation was about class. There are indigenous Liberians and what are called "Americo-Liberians" descendants of freed American slaves who were sent back to Africa with the permission/expense of the US Government. Of course many of these now freed slaves were generations removed from Africa and basically thought of the indigenous. It did not help that the US government established a government system that mirrored that of the US and placed the freed slaves in positions of power to rule over this newly settled land of Liberia. After years and years of simmering animosity as most oppressed people usually do, they rebelled. This led to 14 years of coups, corrupt government, and extreme poverty. When Ellen came into power she had a country that had no electricity or running water for 8 years, no school systems in place, 90% unemployment rate, debt 30 times more than the annual budget.

I looked at those statistics and was blown away. I looked at the poverty and the US governments part in the whole process. Then my mind went to a place few has ventured. What if the US got tired of black folk and decided to call them all in. Hold up now, let me finish. What if they preempted all programing and told all African Americans to report to "staging areas"?

Okay, we know most black people have 1 gun - or none - and 6 bullets. For the sake of argument, lets say several have a bunch of weapons. First, they would tell all white folk to get out of the cities and then bomb that bitch. You feeling me? That would corral a bunch of negroes. All your white buddies would then be nothing but white - not buddies - simply white. They sure wouldn't run to the cities with your ass. Let alone hide you in their attic. The US can't find Bin "Thin" Latin, but they'll find negroes hiding under the boardwalk.

I don't know if you've driven across the US, but if you have, you know there are miles and miles and miles of places that a brotha CAN'T hide. What? Don't believe me, ask the Indian about that.
That reminds me. The American Indian had strong warriors on swift horses. But apparently, they were not fast enough. So, we can't forget about communications. Do I need to say how vital a role that plays in any... ahh, war. A 30 day phone card is not going to get it. And BET is owned by white folks.

The Jewish community could blend in. Yep, all they have to do is change their names and take off that Star Of David. But black folks can't hide. Where are they gonna run? If they run to the West there's a great body of water called the Mississippi River. Uh huh, that's going to stop many right there. And, if some make it to the other side they will not be met by the underground railroad. Not Harriet Tubman, nor Oprah, will be waiting for them with a glass of kool-aid or a new refrigerator. Nope, cornfields, haystacks and shotguns will be the name of the game.

How many airplanes do black folks own? Heck, how many black pilots do you know? Who's going to come to the rescue of the black man in America? Is the black man really needed? Affirmative action will not fly. The bill of rights and civil rights will be null and void.

Is the black man really needed? There will be jobs for everyone - white. Unemployment will be at it's lowest. No more BET to wreck the minds of the inquisitive white kids. White folks could turn on the TV and root for all the white guys shooting 3 pointers. Dunking will be banned. There would be no more debates about immigration because everybody that even looks like they've ever kissed a dark skinned person would have to run for the hills.

I know this scenario might sound a little crazy but am just saying... is the black man needed in the US? Some might argue the contributions the black man has made on this country, like jazz and the peanut, but really? Who needs the black man to make more babies they can not afford, nor feed? Who needs the black man to sell more drugs and increase the crime rate? Why doesn't America take the black man out of his misery before unemployment hits the levels of Liberia? Heck, they're already killing each other. Should the black man get ready because isn't there a train a coming? Do we need another million man march or HBO special about the plight of the black man? Should we call Cornel West and his boys to hold another round table discussion. Maybe we should just bitch and moan and cry and bullshit while telling others what "THEY need to do"

Yawl gonna make me lose my mind, up in here, up in here. Yawl gonna make me act a fool, up in here, up in here. Yeah, some believe America can do without rap music too. To many blacks making money off that mess. That gutter bowl - jelly roll - bump yo booty, don't you know. I don't know, is it me or does America really need black folks?

I think there's a train a comin'. And... that's my opinion.

Keith said...
Hahahahahahaha, Funny, but good points made there. I love this blog because you make me think..Even when I don't want to..Does America really need the Black man?But of course...America would have no rythem without us...no soul...and God knows..America needs a soul.

A Free Spirit Butterfly said...
It doesn't matter what America needs... GOD said it and it is so!Love ya. To copy off of Keith, you got my brain doing stuff it don't want to do when it's home just chill'n (LOL)Ms. Butterfly

CareyCarey said...
@ Keith ...I tried to keep it light, but it was written to make us think.

freemanpress said...
I think the time when they needed us has long passed and now they don't know what to do. Since the Mexican cats have crossed the borders and taken all the sharecropping jobs we are in the cities. Now never forget taking care of sick people is also a money maker so as long as we remain sick we are a tax base to be exploited.They needed us to do the work they didn't want to do now they need us to be a exploitable people so they can make money. Overall we are not needed but they will never get their own folks to do anything but say they are entitled to the land. Can't grow with someone who feels they don't have to do nothing at all.

CareyCarey said...
Dang Freeman, you've made some very interesting points. Yeah, the only way some feel like they're up is to have others beneath them.

Mizrepresent said...
Well the way these folks are acting up around here...i wouldn't put it past them to give it a try. One friend of mine told me about how gun sales have went up almost 50% in the last couple of months. Somebody out there is stocking up on guns, and from the looks of it, it ain't us.

A Free Spirit Butterfly said...
Just checking in. Have a great weekend! Love ya crazy, I mean Carey (LOL)Ms. Butterfly

El Nuyorican said...
This shit was funny, but it also made some excellent points. It reminds me of a story, Space Invaders" by Derrick Bell in "Face at the bottom of the Well." In it, aliens come from out of space and promise America all the free fuel they'll ever need and some other shit, but the catch was they had to tuen over all black folk. The story is both funny and very insightful.This post reminded me of that story. I like your stule, bro! LOLEddie

CareyCarey said...
@ Miz ...I've heard similar talk of gun sales increasing. I don't know Miz, I 've seen plenty of brothas get killed AND they had a gun. If you had a gun I doubt it would stop another from killing you.

"But of course...America would have no rhythm without us." What Keith says sounds real...Perhaps every nation, ethnic group or culture finds it rhythm eventually. But without us, it would have taken America so damn long!

A Free Spirit Butterfly said...
Just stopping in to say Hello and wishing you a happy whatever day you happen to check this day!Love and hugsMs. ButterflySending prayers your way!

A Lady's Life said...
Thanks for visiting my post:)I think America(and the world) needs good people. I think you find good and bad in all races, in all countries,in all religions. You can't just clump people and stereotype them. I don't like rap because of the swear words. I don't like women being disrespected by calling them bitches and telling them they need to go down.That is not love. It's not love that is going to last. Women are Mothers and no child likes to hear its Momma being called a bitch. Fathers have to look into the eyes of the babies they create and I know they love them but all children need and Mother and a Father and peace and joy. No child worries about money as much as they worry about not having parents. Money never made much of a difference to me as a child.:) Then the gun issue is disturbing. You know, if there were no customers for the drugs, the business would go away on its own very quietly. Why do people take drugs? There are so many other ways to get a high without it hurting you or anyone else.:)That's what I believe:)